In your hands is where your dreams are

Dear Alyssa

2006-02-02T00:57:00.000-08:00

My only fun nowadays is my part time job at tumble tot, Children developing center. I do enjoy it every weekend. Kids are so cute and full of surprise! You never stop smiling when you’re around them.

Looking at them make me think of my dear little girl I took care when I was in USA.

Alyssa she was about a year when I first there. She was so cute little thing. When she first started to talk……Well well I just like the way she call me.

My name is Yui. But since she was just about to started talk Of course Yui mussta be real hard for her to say. So she called me Vi Vi. Now I still don’t see the connection between Yui and Vi Vi . Ha ~

Lisa is sweet and she loves to sing. And I should have keep that in mind all the time ! One day we were at the table in the kitchen. While I was fixing our lunch, then I heard Lisa say “Prickle prickle…….” I did turn around and ask you want prickle liz? Sparking in her eyes told me that it wasn’t Prickle she wanted but she was singing “Twinkle twinkle little star” Ha ~

That wasn’t all about Twinkle yet! At dinner we did pray before we eat. Most of the time Johnny the big brother would lead us, but that day I guess the little sister want to do too. She was trying her best to hold the other hands then start to say her pray. Oh yeah… it was Twinkle twinkle little star again! Ha ~

Know what? When you’re asking kids you gotta be specific otherwise ………

Every house got rules I believe. Ours too. Rule number 1 never ever run in the house ‘cause you might fall and hurt. But not much kids think about that.

One day liza was running in the house. Sure thing! She fell. She came with tear in her eyes and looking for sympathy from me. Of course I wouldn’t give it easy! She needs to learn the lesson. I asked her coldly “Why do you think you fell?” Man, I should remember how old she was when I asked. The answer from my dear sweet liza was “..’lippery”. My dear was trying to say “because the floor is slippery” Ok now how could you still acting so cold after that sincere answer. I couldn’t.

Ah~ Thinking about her make me so warm. I don’t know when I’m going to be able to see them again. But I do pray for that day to come. Last time I saw them they are all so big Lisa was turning 4 already.

Next time my sweet Tessa may be. The second and middle in line.

Dearest Fanny,

2006-01-26T20:09:00.000-08:00

I am Thai and Fanny is French. We were an Au Pair in USA.
She got blue eyes and I got black. But we use our heart looking at each other.
She probably eats French toast and I eat sticky rice. But I love when she make toast and she like when I cook rice.
She likes to go out and I love to read. But I have fun when she drags me out and she enjoys the book I read.

One year together in USA. Seem like we know each other for long. She is the one and only friend I fight with the most. I say what I want to her and she say what she want to me then we fight. But at the end she let me have my way and I let her has hers.

Fanny dear friend, I love you really.

God…. Didn’t you know how best she is? Didn’t you know how much we love kid and didn’t you know how bad she wants one?

2 times you took the baby away from her and she didn’t even get to see their face.
Now again the 3rd time you took him away form her since the start. Then why would you start it at the first place?

It’s just not fair.

Fanny dearest, I really don’t know what I should say to you this time. I wish I could just sit next to you and hold your hand then we will need no word. But France and Thai are just so far away from each other.

I wish I have magic door from Doraemon then I can hug you every time you sad.
I probably can’t help you anything but I just want to cry with you.

Dear……if you gonna take it away from her again then better not give her at all.

Long time old friend

2006-01-17T19:28:00.000-08:00

Last week, I was chating with Fanny, my dearest best friend. Man, I was so happy to chat with her. Since it's such a hard to do. She's always busy. Oh yeah..... guess what she is going to have a baby! Dear god, I wish you won't take this one away from her again. 2 was enough. I do pray with all my heart for your baby's well, Dear friend. Anyway,one thing I got from that chat is " being so far away doens't mean anything for us". I miss you Fanny dear.

All right enough for her,Now guess what I only got 65 more days 'till I fly to the sun. Man, how much I am looking forward to it. I really can't wait now. Each day the sun goes down, Each day my heart beating faster. I am leaving soon. oh yeah I really am.

Dear all,

I will be leaving on 24 March 2006 at 00:14 (actually it's 25) and will be arriving Tokyo at 8:00. Then my new life , my dream will began.

Holy, I really can't wait!

ชะรอยคุณยุ้ยจะเป็นคุณหนูปลอมตัวมา

2005-11-27T20:00:00.000-08:00

เมื่อเร็วๆนี้ ไอ จัส คิดได้ ว่าจริงๆแล้วข้าพเจ้าต้องเป็นคุณหนูปลอมตัวมาแน่เลยว่ะ......... แม่ง มีอย่างที่ไหนทำงานครึ่งวันเสร็จแล้วก็กลับได้ แถมที่ทำน่ะก็คือนั่งเล่นเนต ลงฟิก .... เจริญ..... ดูท่าทางชีวิตคุณยุ้ยเนี่ยจะไม่เหมาะกับการทำงานหนักในเมืองไทย สองงานมาแล้วที่เป็นอย่างนี้

งานแรก ที่โรงแรม เป็นพนักงานต้อนรับ วันๆยืนยิ้มเฉยๆ สิ้นเดือนได้ตัง คงเป็นเพราะพรีเซ็นต์ดี เจ้านายรักฉิบหาย ฮุ ฮุ แต่เพื่อนร่วมงานน่ะ รู้หมดว่าไอ้คุณยุ้ยคุณหนูปลอมตัวมาเนี่ย โคตรจะวันๆไม่ทำไรเลย ทั้งวันทำมันอยู ห้านาที ช่วงเจ้านายเดินมาพอดี หึ หึ ก็รับไปความดีความชอบ สบาย......

งาน ณ ตอนนี้ หึ หึ แดมจริง สบายยิ่งกว่า นั่งเฉยๆ สิ้นเดือนรับตัง ก๊อด..... แถม ออฟชั่น เงืนเดือนมากกว่าเดิม บวก ทำงานครึ่งวัน โอ้......ชะรอยจะเป็นคุณหนูปลอมตัวมาจริงๆว่ะ .........

เฮ้ออออ เซ็ง อยากมีอะไรทำโว้ยยยย

Somebody gives me thing to do please………….

คุณหนูเบื่อโว้ยยยย อยากทำงานแบกหาม หนักอ่ะ

A story from the back of my drawer

2005-11-16T19:22:00.000-08:00

I haven’t been writing anything for a long long time. There are so many things happen. My life, work….

Days ago… I found one story.

There is a little boy who is turning 24 next March. Yeah….he is turning 24 yet he is just a little boy.

How old you should be to be able to realize what is good and what is bad?
How old you should be to be able to stand on your own feet?

And the answer is it doesn’t matter of how old are you but it’s who you are and what you are.

This boy seems like he doesn’t understand how to appreciate others.
This boy seems like he doesn’t understand how to live.
This boy seems like he doesn’t understand life.

He doesn’t understand anything. In all his 24 years. He has learned nothing but depending on others. He is depending on others yet he is not appreciating others.

Do you blame the boy? I am not. I’m blaming on the others.

Why would they let the boy grew up like this? Now what do they want from him since they’re teaching him this way.

If you teaching him how to steal then why would you expect him to grow up to work and earn.

If you giving him things without question, why now expect him to have the answer.

Raising something is not easy. The best pedigree could turn into the worst pedigree you could ever have.

And who is for you to blame but yourself.

Now I cry alone in the dark.

2005-10-12T20:27:00.000-07:00

Guess what? Eri quitted. This Friday will be her last day at work.

I …………..

I………..

I…..feel left out.

She asked me to quit and go to Japan right now. Mann…… how much I would want to do that but I can’t. How can I go there now? I told her I can’t I have to wait for the Visa. She asked can’t I wait in Japan. There are any job in Japan for you… Eri, dear sometime things are not as easy as you think………

Right now I feel so unsteady. I don’t know what the hell am I going to do. Now we don’t have road show, we don’t sell Prominous and we don’t have anyone come to Thailand. So why do you want to have me here.

There is nothing I can do. There is nothing for me to do.

Before I think I still have Eri so it is fine. Even thought I got nothing to do but I know there is still Eri and she doesn’t have things to do either. Not that I am happy that she doesn’t have thing to so but….at least I feel like I have some one I can talk too.

But she is leaving…….. I felt left behind.

While she can go and look for something else, I can’t.
While she can do and start new things now, I can’t.

I have 5 more months.

It was only 5 more months with Eri…

BUT

It is another damn 5 months without her.

What the hell I’m going to do?

Somebody tell me please.

What is you choice

2005-10-11T20:26:00.000-07:00

The other day my student was telling me a story. It started with a man and women were so much in love in each other. Then one day they got separated by the river. The man was on the other side of the river. So the woman tried to get to the other side. She was asking the first man to help her to get cross the river but the first man denied her request. So she went to the second man. This man agreed to help but she had to sleep with him. And she did just that. Now she got to the other side of the river. But the man she loved found out that she slept with the other guy and he can’t accept so he dumps the woman. The third man came along he listen to her story and took her with him because she got no one here and she can’t go back.

So the question is who is in this story that you like and who that you don’t?

I choose to like the third man and hate…… the woman.

My student was speakless for a few moments and said “I need to think of the answer first. No one ever choose to hate the woman before”

Then she finally told me the result of hating the woman.

She said “The one that choose to hate the woman is the one that not believe in love , confident , dependent and don’t want any body to help…..” some kind of that I don’t remember much now. But….. This is so true.

Why do I hate the woman ? Well….. why don’t you? She is stupid. For just only one man she slept with some one she didn’t even like. Ok ok you might blame and hate the second man but the woman still the first one for me to be blamed. You just let that man take advantage on you. What a stupid woman. I would not want to dishonor myself in such a way.

So now what is you answer?

If you choose to hate the second man (which I believe a lot of people would) then you don’t like people to take advantage on you.
If you choose to like the third man then you like to help people with no question.
If you choose to like the first man then you don’t like to be in someone else business.

I don’t remember what are you if you choose to hate the man she loved.

Well………you can say I never have love so I can say whatever I like. But once I really fall in love with someone I will do everything it takes to keep that love.

Well….. yeah …. May be …but not now…If love mean I have to stop my dream, dishonor myself, blocking my way….then I would stay without love.

Fly me to the moon

2005-10-07T02:21:00.000-07:00

Hello….

It has been a while since I last updating this page. How is everything right now? Well…..Things are not going so good BUT it wasn’t bad after all.

I got a new part time job. I get to teach English Conversation. This is my first time teaching adult. All my student in the part were children. She is my first adult but my 8th student. How is the class? Well I don’t know is this better or worst that teaching kids. Teaching adult of course they’re doing what you tell them but they are not stupid. Teaching kids, they don’t do a damn thing you’re begging them to do But they are so naïve and never ask hard questions. Anyway, I like it so far.

Never mind forget about that…. Guess what now we are in October… You know what is that mean? Yeah Yeah … it means I only have 5 more months left to go.

Should I be happy? May I be happy? Can I be happy?

Man…wasn’t the last time I talk about this that I had 10 months left? Damn …time fries really.

But you know what….. Life is not easy… I get enough money to go but it doesn’t mean I get enough money to stay as long as I want. I will of course to work damn hard. Doing everything I could to get enough money to stay and make my dream.

Well…. Is that scaring me?

Hu hu …… not at all….

I am so ready for so long……

Life is something when you’re trying to do something.

The time has come.

2005-08-31T08:48:00.000-07:00

ทำงานมาได้ ๑ ปี กะอีก ๗เดือนแล้ว ......................... วันนี้วันดี ได้มีโอกาศคุยกับผู้จัดการที่ดูแลที่สิงค์โปร์ หลังจากคุยกันนานถึง ๓ ชั่วโมง ตัวเองที่คิดว่าอ้วนกลมน่ารัก กลับเหลือ ประมาณ ครึ่ง พระเจ้า...... What the hell have I been doing with my life…… คุณโทนีเป็นคนฉลาดมากๆ The way of his thinking and the way of him trying to improve himself is really impress me. Come to look at myself…. Again what the hell have I been doing with my life?

ข้าพเจ้าเสียเวลากว่า ๒ ปี โดยไม่ได้ทำอะไรเลย and guess what the worst thing is ข้าพเจ้ายิ่งแย่กว่าเดิมอีก ข้าพเจ้าปีนี้ก็อายุจะ ๒๖ แล้ว looking back I have nothing, I learn nothing. And no no I don’t blame the Company. ข้าพเจ้าคือคนที่ควรจะด่าที่สุด เหตุไฉนข้าพเจ้าถึงได้ Let the thing around me drag me down. เหตุไฉนข้าพเจ้าถึงได้ปล่อยเวลาที่แสนสำคัญในช่วงเวลาที่ข้าพเจ้ายังเด็ก ช่วงเวลาที่ข้าพเจ้า สามารถจะเรียนรู้ ทำไมถึงปล่อยไปโดยมิได้ทำอะไรเลย I have been stupid all along.

Come to think about เป้าหมายของข้าพเจ้า เป้าหมายของข้าพเจ้าคืออะไร ข้าพเจ้าอยากเรียนรู้สิ่งต่างๆ ข้าพเจ้าอยากเรียนรู้สิ่งใหม่ๆ ข้าพเจ้าอยากเป็นคนเก่ง ข้าพเจ้าอยากเป็นคนสำคัญ ข้าพเจ้าอยากเป็นคนใหญ่คนโต ข้าพเจ้าอยากเป็นคนที่คนรอบข้างต้องเหลียวมองและยอมรับ แต่สิ่งที่ข้าพเจ้าทำ all along คือ การปล่อยเวลาแต่ละวันของข้าพเจ้าให้หมดไปกับ stupid things. ข้าพเจ้า มิได้แม้เพียงน้อยนิด Try to do something to make all the thing I wanna be come true. So yeah the one to blame is ข้าพเจ้าเอง.........

ถึงเวลาแล้วล่ะ ที่ข้าพเจ้าควรจะจริงกับกับชีวิตให้มากกว่านี้ ถึงเวลาแล้วล่ะที่ข้าพเจ้าควรจะ go for สิ่งที่ข้าพเจ้าต้องการ เปล่า ข้าพเจ้าไม่ได้หมายความว่าข้าพเจ้าควรจะทิ้ง all the stupid things ที่ข้าพเจ้าสนุกสนานกับมันมาโดยตลอด I know it stupid yet it does somehow color my life. The thing I want to say is….. ถึงเวลาแล้วที่ข้าพเจ้าควรจะจริงจังกับชีวิตมากกว่านี้ At this age I should be somebody not no body.

Dear People We Should Aim High And Go For It.

ข้าพเจ้ารู้ว่ามันอ่านแล้วไม่รู้เรื่อง เพราะมันเป็นเรื่องที่ Damn hard for me to explain. โดยเฉพาะ ข้าพเจ้าผู้ซึ่งไม่เคยจะพูดรู้เรื่องเลยในซักกะภาษา

But the key point is “Yaeh.. the time has come to me to Aim high and go for it”

Priceless love

2005-08-13T09:10:00.000-07:00

The other day when I was on the bus I couldn’t help myself but over heard 2 boys’ talking. They are I think in high school.

The first boy was first talking about his girl friend that how annoy she was and bla bla.. I wasn’t really listening to that one yet. Then the other one say “You know what the women that always be with me and care the most about me is my Mom”

Then he said “Mother will always mean good to their child without want something in return”. He said he’s really respect his mom he would do whatever his mom said. I really like this one he said “If my mom tell me to do then I do , if she tell me to stop then I stop” Ahhh how’s sweet!!

Then he said “when your mom hit you that because she wants you to be good. That because she want to teach you something. The other woman that cares about you is Teacher. She teaches us many good things. I won’t be mad at her if she hit me ‘because I know she mean good to me”

This is from one teenage boy. How sweet he is! I wish more teenagers appreciate their mother’s love for them. Then our Thai will live in harmony. Then there will be no more news about abandon old one.

Sad but true… month ago I saw on the news about one old mother was trick by her own child to temple. Those evil told their own mother , own grand mother that they would take her to worship at one temple some where far. Then they took her there and left her……..

How could they do this!!!!!!!

On the news she said “I am still waiting for them to come back to take me home. I didn’t bright any money and I don’t know how to go back. I think may be they will come back” On the news said she was there for already 3-4 days. She got food from monk and sleep somewhere in the temple.

Just if every child thinks only half of the teenager I met on the bus then we won’t have this sad story again.

Thai massage.

2005-07-28T07:57:00.000-07:00

Today I went for Thai Massage! It was my first time to do this. I always having a fancy idea that when you do the massage you will feel so ~ good, relax.

My friend and I did 2 hours Thai massage. This place is new and it’s quite nice. Before we started they washed our feet first. Man… I felt like I am the princess.

Ok, then the woman started from my feet. Well… if you ask!?! Yeahh it was good. I felt relax a little bit. Then she move up to my thigh….. Ok now it felt too good, too relax. I was laughing so badly. Man… It was so tickle. I couldn’t stop laughing. I asked my friend “Aren’t you tickling” and she said no. She had an experience with the massage before. The woman said if you are not used to it then you will feel it tickle.
I told my friend that I am not used to having somebody touching me like that! And she said “Yeah… because you don’t ……..” Well~ I don’t need to tell this to the world, do I?

Then from my thigh she move up to my back. First I wasn’t sure what the feeling was. I wasn’t sure was it tickled or hurt then she did it 2-3 more times. And man then I knew….it was hurt! I don’t really know how she did it but I felt like her fingers pinching my back. I told her it hurts. She said you will feel better after.

When she finished with the back she lifts my leg up high and places it on her shoulder and push in front. And yeah … that hurt too. Then she made me turn to put my tummy on the mat. She got hold of my arms and pulls it backwards with her foot on my back and Gezz that hurt!

Finally the 2 hours passed. My friend asked “how is it?”

Well…. I don’t know!!! I don’t really feel anything. No …not as relax, not as good as I expected.
It was just …. Ok ok.

However, it was such a good experience though. If you never try it before! Well~ you should!!

A trip to remember

2005-07-24T07:04:00.000-07:00

I just came back from Singapore today!!! Ah..... Man ..who ever say there is nothing in Singapore !! They are so wrong!! It was so nice actually. This trip is really different than others. You know why ?! ‘Cause it was my first time traveling alone! Ok ok for some people it might not a big deal … but hey.. I am Thai women and if you think about that you will know that it’s not really common! Well….at least my family and friends think that!!! First I was kind of scare and not sure that I would be able to travel alone!!

NOW…. I know that I can!!

Singapore!?! Well … if you ask? It’s nice clean and neat. My favorite would be the musical fountain. And that was the only time I want my family and friends to be with me. I want them to see this too! I swear I gonna take my whole family there!!

Am I being use?

2005-07-04T02:37:00.000-07:00

In the business who should you trust? And the answer is no one. You should never trust anyone! You want to know a tip of getting success in your carrier?

“Don’t say your opinion. Do as they say” Yep…. You will be completely fool and being completely useless. But guess what you will still be in the company.

Acting so smart, having a fantastic idea …..

Yeah… and that could kill you.

Damn it!! I am so stress.

Mean girl…yeah that’s me!

2005-06-21T00:37:00.000-07:00

I want to be a sweet girl. All my life I have never cared about such a thing before.

No…not until today.

Lots of people say that my personality is too strong. I speak so loud, fast and in the aggressive way. I say without thinking, I hurt people with my words. I am a bad girl.

I do that to my brother sister, my aunt, my friends, even the one I first met. I do that to everyone.

And I do that to my mom…..

My mom is in the hospital now. She got a really bad stomach ache. She was lying down on the bed weakly. She looked so old, too old and I hated that. I hate to look at my mom like this. I want her to laugh, smile, saying something funny to me.

NO…. I don’t like to see her lying down ………

Do I care about my mom? Of course I do…. But why can’t I be sweet to her. Why can’t I tell her softly, sweetly that she is doing okay. Everything will be all right. Why can’t I comfort her with smile.

Instead of doing that…. I was telling her in the strong and aggressive voices that don’t worry too much. It’s non sense what are you worrying. Be strong!! You are just over thinking yourself. Everything is ok. Stop worry! Stop acting so sick !

Of course the reason I told her to stop because… I hate to see her worry, hate to see her weak, and hate to see her cry…... but why can’t I told her in the softly way.

Do I care about my mom?? Of course.. with all my heart…

But why can’t I be sweet girl to her…………..

Mean girl... yeah that’s me!

some day my Prince will comes

2005-06-09T21:21:00.000-07:00

Couple days ago my sister and I were talking about the “One and destiny”.

She said “If there is the ONE then even though we are hiding in the house, going no where the ONE will still come along and find you. You don’t have to run out looking for one”

Well~ what do you think? For me I think…….. Yeah yeah I do believe in Destiny and the ONE.

HOWEVER…………..

Don’t you think that we should doing something more than just sit and waiting? No no I don’t think destiny and the one will come along easy. Okay let see this.

Cinderella: I don’t think she would make it to the Princess if she didn’t go out for the party.

Jasmine: If she didn’t escape from the palace then she wouldn’t get a chance to meet Aladdin.

Aerial: She came out of the ocean just to find the prince.

Belle: She wouldn’t meet the Beast if she didn’t leave her house and knock on his door.

Snow white: Didn’t she have to go in the forest to meet the Price.

Aurora: Well well I can’t say about sleeping beauty. She was lucky just sleeping and wait for the Prince to come in the castle. But…. Didn’t she have to wait for 100 years before Prince came along?? Well.. well..ok if you can wait like 100 years. Then go ahead.

Come to think about this…. Do you know who is the one who can just sit and waiting without doing anything?

Yep….The Princes.

Hey sis, I think that option you though of is just for the Prince!!

Well~ So as you see, Even all the Princesses would have to go out and looking for the Princes then don’t you think we definitely can’t just sit and waiting for the one to come along!?

We have to go out and find one by our own!!

However, I don’t think the Prince would be in the Club though.

I have no train to borad.

2005-05-31T03:16:00.000-07:00

Weeks ago I found a book in the store. The thing that interests me wasn’t the story but the introduction part from the writer. The story was about a guy who gone to Japan as a bag packer. He didn’t have much money and slept on the street. However, I didn’t buy it. Last Sunday, I found this book again at my friend’s place and it reminds me again how much I like the introduction.

In the introduce part from the writer that I really like. He says there is a part he likes in “Polar Express”. It says

“It doesn’t matter where the train is going to take you.
The importance thing is your decision whether take that train or not”

So they were talking about ….. What would it be if we take that train or didn’t take that train? Then he asked his fiends
“Have you ever missed any train?” A couple minute passed before one of his friends said

“I have no train to board”

I don’t know what this book really is because I haven’t finished it yet. But I really like that sentence.

Yeah….. We can say that Man, you should have take the train. Why do you have to be scare, you should have take the chance…. Sad but true…..There are people that their train never comes.

I was so lucky that my first train came in my life when I was 20 and lucky enough for that train to come in easily happily. All I have to do was to decide whether to do it or not. See ~ that easy that sometime I forgot for some people they need more that just to decide whether to do it or not.

……First of all they need the train……

“I have no train to board” This sentence hit me hard. It makes me realize some people they don’t ever get a chance……..

What am I doing here?

2005-05-19T01:04:00.000-07:00

Lately I’m asking myself what am I doing here. Here is my second full time job. Before I was working in the Hotel as LSA which is Lobby Service Agent. My job was to go around the lobby seeing the guest comfortable. Well… I liked it actually. Why not?... It was fun meeting many people from around the world, Talking to them, Helping them. I got to help the people when they’re having problems and get the see their happy face when the problem was solved. Plus there were so many people working in the hotel. I learned so many things from the elder, younger. I got to meet the important people in the hotel – the dish washer in the kitten. There was so much fun in the Hotel.

“I loved working in the Hotel” Yet, I quitted! Meeting the guest was fun, Talking to them was nice, but I didn’t at all using my brain, my ability. No no I am not so smart or that clever. However, I believed I can do more than that.

So~ I am changing from blue collar to a white collar. My job now is better and I think I can step forward from this job. That was I thinking when I was quitting the Hotel.

But….. now I am not so sure…. Am I really learning something here? If so what is it that I’ve learned?

Again… I’m asking myself what am I doing here?

Joseph and his dreamcoat

2005-05-16T00:15:00.000-07:00

When I was in USA. There was one musical movie that the kids and I enjoyed the most.

----------Joseph and the amazing Technicolor dreamcoat---------

The kids and I would sing it all day long over and over again. Yeahhh we really love this musical movie. When I got back from USA I found this VDO in Bangkok and bought it. Then I totally forget about it. Just yesterday I went through all my VDO. I found it and turn it on. Man…… no matter how many times I see this I’m still impressed by the story and the songs.

It was such a good story and beautiful songs. The story is about Joseph and his dream. Here is the prologue.

♪ ♪ Some folks dream of the wonders they'll doBefore their time on this planet is throughSome just don't have anything plannedThey hide their hopes and their heads in the sandNow I don't say who is wrong, who is rightBut if by chance you are here for the nightThen all I need is an hour or twoTo tell the tale of a dreamer like you
We all dream a lot - some are lucky, some are notBut if you think it, want it, dream it, then it's realYou are what you feel
But all that I say can be told another wayIn the story of a boy whose dream came true and it could be you.♪ ♪

Ahhh it’s such a beautiful song with a wonderful meaning.
However, there is a part I don’t like….. In the story Joseph was a Jacob’s favorite son.

♪ ♪Through young Joseph, Jacob lived his youth againLoved him, praised him, gave him all he could, but thenIt made the rest feel second best .♪ ♪
♪ ♪Jacob wanted to show the world he loved his son. To make it clear that Joseph was the special one. So Jacob bought his son a coat A multi-colored coat to wear.♪ ♪

Yeah… and that where the story is began. The brothers were really upset with this. Well well I don’t blame them!! So they sold Joseph to Egypt and told Jacob that he was death. Joseph went through the miserable life in Egypt but at the end he became someone important in Egypt.
Now now talking about the brothers. People said the brothers were mean and cruel! But…… I think the meanest in the story was Jacob. If he wasn’t such a partial dad, then I think the brothers wouldn’t do this, would they?

One can’t always do what one want

2005-05-14T08:43:00.000-07:00

Today I just watched the movie. There is one part in the movie that the guy is talking to his friend that he doesn’t know what he really wants to do. He just got a job at the big company which has nothing to do with the things he has learned or liked. Ok…. Big company with good money…. Doing what he likes but no money. At the end….He goes for the thing he likes and wants to do…

Long time ago I talked to my friend about this.

Not everyone gets to do what they like for living. The fancy dream is the fancy dream. It won’t keep you alive.

Yeah yeah in the movie you can say whatever you want to say! But in the real life, how many people get the do what they really want to do??!!

I wanted to be like Mary Popins but being Mary Popins in Thai won’t make enough money. If I were a nanny..Think… how long I have to wait to get enough money to go study in Japan which is another dream I have.

Sometimes you have to give up something to make another thing come true.

Dreams

2005-05-10T03:20:00.000-07:00

Last night I was counting all my money and the money I am going to make…….. Well… well…. seem like I am not so far from my dream now. I only have about 10 months and 20 days before I can make my dream come true.

“I want to go study in Japan”

This has been my only dream for the longest time. I don’t know why Japan. But I just love it. Since I was in High school I always wanted to go to Japan USA England. When I was 15, I wanted to see the world. I love languages. I wanted to go abroad so bad…… But that kind of dream seem crazy to everyone around me even to myself at the time. How a girl like me would be able to do that? No one think what was I thinking are good. I am not rich….. and guess what…? Being rich does make thing different. For the rich, they can just go where ever, when ever they want. Yeah Yeah I was jealous the rich. I admitted. See~ my dream seem stupid and crazy at the time……BUT…..

It is not now.

One thing I’ve learn in the last 10 years. You don’t have to be rich to make your dream come true But you need to have a gut to flight for your dream.

My first journey started in 2000. I went to USA as Au Pair. It’s the program for young lady to go work and study aboard. You don’t need to have a lot of money ‘cause you will work there. Of course my family didn’t want me to go ‘cause they didn’t know this program. They’re not trust in this program. Actually, me neither. But my mind was set. I wanted to do this. Then I went. Soooooo……….. It was such a great experience that ones could ever have. I could never forget the time I had there with my American family and friends. This journey was changing my life completely.

The first journey follows by the second one, the third and the forth……..

Well well actually money is still the big matter. Rich does make thing easy…. But know what….. I now think I don’t have too be rich to make my dream come too. If my dream needs money in order to make it come true.

THEN I will make it with my own hand. And that what I’m trying to say.

***Let’s have a dream and make it come true.

Just make a wish it won’t come to you.***

I got a cold.

2005-05-07T04:48:00.000-07:00

Ahhh-choooo...... I got a cold.....in Summer when it's so hot.

I heard people say only stupid and crazy people get cold in summer.

Ummm...... I am trying to figure it out which one I am????

Beggar

2005-05-05T06:56:00.000-07:00

Today I went for dinner with my family. While I was walking on the street I saw an old lady sitting on the said walk. I think she must be around 60 up. She is beggar. Then suddenly a man cut in front of me and walks directly to her and said “Here…” That man gave an old lady 20 baht. I’ve never give money to a beggar that much. 10 baht would be the maximum for me...

But….. That’s not my point… guess who is this kind(?) man.

For behind he didn’t have shoes on. Both of his hands and feet were black and dirty. His shirt was torn. His hair was messy. I didn’t get to see his face but I can tell that he had a beard. Yeah…… he is also a beggar or homeless.

My mom said “They are helping each other” ……..Indeed….

I was really wondering where did he get the money from? Why did he give it to her?

I don’t really to give money to beggar because I don’t want to spoil them. If they know they can earn money by this way then they will never want to work.

Talking about a beggar, last year I went to AUS. While I was standing on the street with my friend, there was lady walking to me and said “Would you spare one dollar please?”
We knew what she said and what she meant but we didn’t want to give her. So we pretended not understand on what she said. We were talking in Thai.

Then guess what……..

She said “Are you Thai?” in Thai ! ( pen kon thai ru plo ka) Jackpot baby!!! Why do I have to run into a Thai beggar in AUS.? Here we go now she got us.

She started from when she was young……why her life became like this? She said she was tricked by someone. She can’t work and not because she didn’t want to but they don’t let her and on and on……. Oh know what…. she even taught us what is “would you spare a dollar” mean ……. Then she got a dollar from me !! It was 30 baht!! I didn’t want to waste my time with her any longer so I just gave her a dollar. Man ! 30 baht to a beggar on X’mas day!!! I turned to my friend and whisper “I mustta be so lucky and rich and live happy for the rest of my life!” Why not !? I gave a beggar 30 baht. What I kind person I was!!!

No no she didn’t leave us yet.. She was asking “ Don’t you have another dollar?” …… She is Thai indeed. How like Thai!!!! When they get one they want two when they get two you want the rest!!!!!

When I was in US I didn’t see any beggar and I heard there is some homeless in Japan but I didn’t see them myself. I think in Thai the gap between the rich and the poor is so big and deep. That why we have so many beggar or homeless. But one day there will be no poor in Thai I hope.

Super Mom!

2005-05-03T00:01:00.000-07:00

I work at Tumble Tots on every Saturday. Tumble Tots is children developing center from England. The children will be from 6 months – 7 years. In each class will be just 45 min. We divided the class by the age of the children. 6 months – walking able, walking – 2 years, 2-3 years and 3-5 years, 5-7 years.

Here at Tumble Tots, the children will learn how to deal with other people, learn how to share, learn how to follow the rules, and learn to be confident child. We’re also teaching them how to claim up, jump, balance …..

Boom is 2 years old boy. He is quite big for his age. He comes to Tumble Tots every Saturday. He is a special kid…….

Boom can’t say a word yet. But yes…. he understand on what others said but he can’t talk back to you. Since he can’t say a word the only way for him to tell people what he want is screaming , banging his head on the floor…..

He has quite a temple. Boom hardly focuses on something long. But he tries….
Boom doesn’t like to share thing. But he tries….
Boom can’t wait in the line. But he tries….

I can tell you that he is improving bit by bit every time I meet him…

Guess who is behind this……. Boom’s mom….

Boom‘s mom is quite small. She is so thin. But her heart is big.

She is doing in every way to help Boom. She told me that she’s taking Boom to the speaking class at the hospital. Boom still can’t speak a clear word but he tries…
Now when we teach him to call each color he will slow say..

Like yellow Boom will say ---low
For Red, boom will say ---ed

Do you think Boom will getting better without this Super mom! He is so lucky to get a mom like this.

Still Boom got a better fortune than the kids I know I USA while I was an Au Pair there.

Raily and Ben . First I met them Raily was 4 years old and Ben was 1. They are cousins of the kids I took care in US.

Raily can’t talk, can’t walk, and can’t help himself. While the kid I took care, Tessa 4 years old. She runs, sings, jump, and laugh. How hard is it going to be for the mother to see others kids run , sing , jump while hers can’t even walk ,talk…….

Last time I went to US in 2003. Raily and Ben turned to 6 and 4. They still can’t walk can’t talk but they do remember me…..